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Post Hip Replacement – Week 3

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So, did I mention I’m learning to walk again? Or so my physical therapist thinks. Frankly, I could limp along just fine the day after surgery. I haven’t bothered with a cane for over a week. If I leave the house, I bring it with me just in case I have to walk on snow or ice, but I don’t even pretend to use it. I just carry it in my hand like a baton.

The physicians assistant and the physical therapist and the nurses in the hospital all said the best thing to do to recuperate is to walk. However, they are quite clear that just any old ambulation isn’t going to cut it. I have to walk with good poster.

I haven’t bothered with good poster in years! I like to limp. I limp and gimp and sidle and anything else it takes to get from one place to another with as little pain as possible. It makes for some very bad habits.

So the physical therapist has me doing “pre-walking exercise.” This involves shifting weight from side to side and from front to back. We aren’t even up to a waddle, but it’s fun to do.

I’m thinking I’d like to rev it up a bit. Like maybe make a mini teeter totter for the side to side thing. Seems like that might be more fun. As for the front and back thing…. Well as soon as I find my treking poles I’m going to just go walking. I’d do without, but it’s still icy around here.

Totally Random Picture – Uluwatu Cliffside Temple in Indonesia

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The Door Into Summer

There were 32 doors in Ruth’s house. She knew for sure because she’d counted them when her cat, Sargent Pepper, insisted on trying each and every one.

The first door she opened let out on a snowbank. Sargent Pepper gave her such a pitiful yowl, as though the cold and wet might be a personal insult.

This was followed by a tour of every room, and every closet until at last they returned to the back door, where, of course, the snow remained.

“I promise someday this door really will let out into summer,” she told him. “Just not today.”

The Challenge: Write a story of 100 words based on a photo
The Hub: Rochelle Wisoff-Fields
Photo credit: Sarah Potter

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Hip Precautions

Until the muscles and tendons around my new, mechanical hip have mellowed out, I’m supposed to be very careful to avoid certain positions. Those positions are, specifically, never let the chest and knee get closer than ninety degrees. Never point the toes inward. Never let the knees get close, let alone cross. And never twist the hips around to look behind you.

1. 90 Degrees? Piece of cake. The arthritis hasn’t let me get my knee up any higher than that in years. Or so I thought. I went past it just by lifting my knee while reclining in the recliner. I really had no idea it would be such a sharp angle. I no longer feel the jab of pain in the front. It’s more a sense of strain and impending disaster in the back.

2. I’ve broken the pigeon toe precaution nearly every morning since the surgery. I wake up to find my foot has been flopped over that direction for who knows how long. It seems to be a natural position. But I can feel the strain in my hip.

3. Walking to the bathroom is treacherous. It takes five turns to get there, each one a chance to go pigeon toed.

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Suzie’s House 492 : Blanking the Slate

Suzie's House

“Hey! Whatcha doing?” The old geezer shouted his question as he walked across the Walmart parking lot. He had crusty jeans, but a fresh plaid shirt over a faded but clean tie-dye T-shirt. His long, gray hair was pulled back in a frizzy, puny ponytail.

Great. Probably another refugee from the Hippie generation. Jim ignored him.

“You really wanna be doing that? Seams like a real waste.”

Continue reading Suzie’s House 492 : Blanking the Slate

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The Foxhle Court by Nora Sakavic p.132

Their waitress passed out bowls and set a pile of napkins in the middle of the table. As soon as she left, Andrew scattered the napkins with an impatient hand. Underneath them all was a pile of packets full of pale yellow powder.

This is from a 3 book series The Girl pushed me into reading. It’s angsty, and full of interesting characters.

Ambrosia of The Purple Booker
hosts Teaser Tuesday. Grab your current read, open to a random page, share a couple of “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page. Go see Ambrosia for more detail.

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Full Hip Replacement – Week 2

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The medical team that did my hip replacement worked very hard to educate me. They sent me to a class where the specific techniques used by my surgeon were discussed. They made me surf into an interactive web site about anesthesia and standard procedures for a hip replacement. I had meetings with the surgeon, his Physician’s Attendant, and the hospital’s pre-op staff. They sent me home with a loose leaf binder full of print outs. I have no idea how a ton of little details slipped past me, but they did.

Before the operation I went through the pages and pages of educational material. I did just what those who know me would expect. I set up a spreadsheet.

In the spreadsheet I listed all the hip precautions and how long each was expected to be in force, what equipment I would need and for how long, what medicine I would be expected to take and for how long, what exercises, what appointment schedule, etc. All with extra notes in additional columns.

So how come I came out of it not knowing when I could roll over in bed? Stupid hip precautions.

In case you haven’t had to go through this, a hip precaution is a position you must never allow your leg to assume. After surgery, every flipping tendon and muscle around the hip is going to be ticked off at you. Until they all calm down, they won’t do a good job of holding your leg in correct position.

I didn’t see anywhere that said specifically how long this was going to take. I get the feeling the range is so broad they don’t want to say. At my last doctor’s appointment they said for me it would probably only be six to ten weeks.

I had no idea the backs of my heels would get so sore from laying and sitting around. They said I’d be able to sleep on my side if I put a pillow between my knees, but so far that has been just as uncomfortable as laying on my back.

Most of all, I had no idea that sleep deprivation would be such a demotivational thing. I got myself off the pain meds pretty fast, so I haven’t been as fuzzy headed as I expected, but I just haven’t felt like doing anything. Except for go to the bathroom. That’s like the star event in my life right now. At least it means I’m getting some exercise, even if I slack off on the routines they want me to do.

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13 Not Really All That Gruesome Details

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I had a total hip replacement. If you’re squeamish or easily bored by medical talk, then this is a good place to stop reading.

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In the Woods

“Is that a piano over there in the woods?” Brandy peered through the trees. “You think it plays? Let’s try!” She took off running.

“Not that one!” Matt followed. “It’s cursed!”

“Hah, hah! Don’t be silly!” The piano played beautifully until the last note.

Then Ruth stormed out the back door of her house. “If you hit a wrong note you have to pay the penalty! It’s the chair for you!” She pointed at a kitchen chair left by the pond. She was so insistent that Brandy sat.

“See?” Matt stood next to her. “If you play that piano, you’ll get turned into part of a performance art piece.”

The Hub: Rochelle Wisoff-Fields
Photo credit: Ted Strutz

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Still out to lunch

Just saying. There won’t be a Suzie’s House next week either, due to doctors appointments. Wait. Is today Wednesday?

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All Quiet on the Western Font

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You probably won’t be hearing much from me for the next few days. I just went in to get a hip replaced.

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Chinese New Year

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13 Friday Fictioneers Posts

I’ve been participating in the blog hop called Friday Fictioneers since April of 2014.  The idea is to write a story of 100 words based in the provided pictures.  A few have piled up.  These are ones that don’t use a particular cast of characters.

1.  Celebration

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Suzie’s House 491 : Goodbye Van Family

Suzie's House

Jim walked for four hours. He would have stopped and slept at the side of the road, but the one thin blanket he had with him didn’t do enough to keep him warm. He had to keep walking until he either found a place to stay, or someone took pity on his cold hitchhiker’s thumb.

Continue reading Suzie’s House 491 : Goodbye Van Family

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Undead and Unappreciated by Mary Janice Davidson p.34

She’d tried – repeatedly – to kill me, but worse, she’d killed other vampires to get to me. And she’d ruined my shirt. She had to go.


Ambrosia of The Purple Booker
hosts Teaser Tuesday. Grab your current read, open to a random page, share a couple of “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page. Go see Ambrosia for more detail.

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Reflecting

Taken right after Thanksgiving while on the way to Yellowstone.

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